


You

by diazbuckleysworld



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Cute, Falling In Love, Fire, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:33:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28996779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/diazbuckleysworld/pseuds/diazbuckleysworld
Summary: Buck comes to the realization that he loves Eddie. He tries to hide it. Eddie is a little slower. Buck is put in danger one too many times. This is how they deal with their love and their dangerous job. Something happens on the job and then Eddie questions everything.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 47





	1. Chapter 1

Buck had never planned for this to happen, but he and Eddie were always together. He didn’t know when he started noticing more about Eddie physically, but he was pretty sure it happened after they made up again after the lawsuit. That night in Buck’s kitchen felt like the beginning, but then again things with them always seemed different. Buck wasn’t this close with any of the other members of the team. He never needed to be in Chimney’s space or needed to have Hen touch him to keep him grounded. One thing was for sure though – Buck needed Eddie. He always needed him, even if he was just smiling from across the room.

That Monday when Buck walked into the firehouse, he was smacked in the face with the vision of Eddie bent over tying his boots. Buck thanked whatever God there was that he didn’t moan at the very sight of him. Buck’s gaze lingered on Eddie’s ass for a moment too long, which prompted Chimney to raise a brow. Buck shook himself out of his stupor and sighed, placing his bag into his locker.

“How was everyone’s weekend?” Buck asked.

“Great.” Hen smiled, “Brought Denny to a movie and then we had a family picnic.”

“That sounds nice. My weekend wasn’t fun, Chris got sick after coming home from abuela’s. I think he might have eaten something bad.”

“How’s he feeling now?” Buck asked, his voice laced with concern.

“Relax, he’s fine. Carla called a little while ago, and she said he was asleep. When I left, he seemed better.” Eddie smiled.

“That’s good. I should get him something.”

“No need Buck. You spoil him too much already.” Eddie chuckled.

Before anyone could say anything else about their weekend the bell sounded, signaling an emergency. Buck hopped into the truck next to Eddie, their knees and shoulders touching which left him shivering at the contact. Chimney watched him from across the truck and smiled knowingly.

The day passes rather smoothly. Everyone left the firehouse rather quickly except Buck and Eddie. They were both left changing in silence. Buck watched Eddie closely, but tried not to make it obvious.  
Buck was trying to figure out how he fell for his best friend – he had been trying to figure that out for the last few months. Eddie sighed bringing Buck back to the present – all his thoughts forgotten.

  
“You wanna come over for some time with the boys?” Eddie grinned, “I know Chris has missed you. Even though he hasn’t been feeling good I’m sure he would be up for a movie and a little Buck time.”

  
Buck chuckled, “Sure, let’s get a pizza on the way.”

  
Eddie grinned and patted him on the back walking towards the exit and Buck followed closely behind. Buck wondered if Eddie would hate him if he knew how he was feeling. It wasn’t like he meant for any of this to happen, he just loved Eddie. So much more than he had planned. The drive to Eddie’s was pretty quiet except for the low hum of the radio. Neither said anything – they just enjoyed the silence.When they pulled up to the house Chris was waiting for them in his pj’s. Carla waved at them from the doorway.

“Dad!”

  
“Hey buddy!” Eddie hugged him, “Feeling better?”

  
“Yeah…” Chris said, “Carla made me soup and I took a really long nap.”

  
“Great. I brought someone to see you.”

  
“Buck!”

“Hey Christopher!” Buck smiled, “I missed you.”

  
“Missed you too. Are you gonna stay the night?” Chris asked.

  
“Maybe. I came to watch some movies with you and we brought a pizza.”

  
“Pizza!” Chris yelled as he made his way to the kitchen.

  
Before following them to the kitchen Eddie said his goodbyes to Carla. He saw her out before he went after Chris and Buck. When he got to them, he smiled at the sight. His boys were laughing and playing around grabbing at the pizza. Buck caught his eye and he grinned wider.

  
“Want some?”

  
“Yeah, let me get you two plates.” Eddie laughed.

  
Once they were all full of pizza they settled on the couch for a movie. Chris got to pick like always because he and Buck were both suckers. Chris ran the house even though Eddie tried to be assertive, but in the end, he could never say no to his son. Christopher smiled over at his dad before assuming his position plastered to Buck’s side. Eddie loved that the two of them got along famously. He got a little jealous sometimes because Chris loved Buck so much. They became fast friends and even though Buck was just Eddie’s friend it always seemed like he was more to them. Buck was there from the beginning and Eddie was thankful for him.

  
It was nights like these that he was truly thankful for Buck and the 118, but mostly for Buck. Eddie loved that Buck helped out with Chris when he needed him. He loved Buck for introducing him to Carla. Eddie loved Buck for many other reasons, but to him they were just really good friend.

  
Buck caught Eddie staring over at him and he raised a brow. Eddie just shook his head and smiled which made Buck turn back to the movie. Eddie wasn’t ready to face the reality that maybe Buck was more to him than a friend, but maybe eventually.

  
\--  
After the movie was over, they put Chris to bed, together and then went back to the couch. Eddie had grabbed beers for them and turned on Terminator 2. They had started watching it the last time Buck was over, but it was after a 24-hour shift so Buck only lasted ten minutes into the movie. Buck hummed into his beer and settled a bit closer to Eddie. After a few moments Eddie smiled and rubbed Buck’s knee. They fell into a comfortable silence until halfway through the movie.

  
“I’ve been thinking…” Eddie said pausing the movie and turning towards Buck.

  
“Okay…”

  
“I was wondering if you would possibly wanna come over more often for movie nights?” Eddie asked. After seeing the look on Buck’s face, he continued, “Chris really loves when you come over. I know he enjoys our weekly movie nights.”

  
“Eddie…” Buck laughed, “We do movie nights twice a week. You want me here more often?”

  
“I wouldn’t mind.” Eddie grinned.

  
“Okay. As long as you’re okay with it...”

  
“Oh, one more thing…” Eddie sighed, “There is this party at Chris’ school. He wanted me to ask if you would come.”

  
Seeing Eddie smiling at him made his heart race. He thought it was going to fly out of his chest with how fast it was beating.

  
“Sure thing.” Buck smiled, knowing he would do whatever Eddie asked of him.

\--

  
The next few weeks they were busy. Non-stop busy, so busy that Chris spent a portion of his time with abuela and Carla. It was like they could not catch a break. Eddie groaned for the second time that day as the bell went off. They raced to the scene of a fire. It was an apartment building and of course Buck wanted perform another rope rescue. He loved the daredevil stuff, but Eddie had a bad feeling. Turns out sometimes you should listen to your gut.


	2. Chapter 2

\--

Eddie rushed over to Buck’s side.

“Promise me you won’t do anything stupid, please.” Eddie begged.

“Will you relax, I will be fine.”

“Chris has that party coming up. Don’t let him down.” Eddie frowned.

“I’ll be fine.” Buck grinned, sending him a wink before making his way down.

Buck safely got to the apartment, but the one thing no one counted on was that the floor would give way. He fell a few apartments below and was trapped. The 118 had to try and rescue one of their own, which was proving difficult for Eddie.

He was always fine under pressure. Nothing ever got to him. Ever. But seeing Buck lying on the floor engulfed him flames scared the shit out of him. Everyone noticed. Hen and Chimney both noticed him losing his cool – neither said anything because they were equally as worried about Buck. After another ten minutes they finally were able to pull Buck to safety, finding another way to safely secure that floor, but he was still unconscious when they put him in the ambulance. Buck was still unconscious when he was being rolled into the emergency room Eddie sighed, making the call he dreaded, but he thought he should be the one to tell Maddie. He was shaking by the time the call ended, a tear sliding down his face. He just wanted to scream, but he couldn’t. Not here. Not in front of everyone, so he did the only thing he could do – wait.

\--

The doctor came over to them a few hours later, explaining that Buck was still unconscious so he was likely knocked out by the initial fall. He wasn’t sure how long it would be before Buck woke up, but he advised them to talk to him as much as they could. Eddie was the first to enter after having a discussion with Bobby. He walked over to the bed sadly, instantly grabbing Buck’s hand.

“I’m really sorry. I should have been there. You needed me more than anything and where was I? On top of the building…I should have gone down too.”

Eddie sat in silence after that wondering if Buck could even hear him. After a few moments he sighed and continued.

“I need you. Do you hear me? I don’t care what you need to do. You fight. Christopher needs you. I NEED YOU.” He said angrily.

There was no response and all Eddie could do was worry that Buck would never wake up, so he exited the room and sat across from Hen. No one knew what to say to him. They could see Eddie was falling apart. After about an hour Bobby told them to go home, but Eddie wasn’t sure he could. What was he supposed to do when his home wasn’t a home without Buck? Bobby rubbed his back and then Eddie got up and walked out. The next few days were the toughest. Bobby contacted Buck’s parents and of course they never showed, but Maddie stayed the night with him and the next few days. Eddie wanted to tell her he would stay, but she was being stubborn. He didn’t blame her but he wanted alone time.

“Please Maddie. Just for a bit.” Eddie sighed.

She looked him over. Eddie looked tired; she was going to argue but she knew that Buck would want him close. She shook her head yes and he disappeared without another thought.

\--

When Eddie stepped into the room all he heard was the machines beeping. He looked over at Buck and focused on his face. Buck looked pale and suddenly Eddie wondered if today was the day he would wake up. He walked over and sat in the chair next to the bed. He squeezed Buck’s hand, but it was just cold and nothing happened.

“Buck…I-Enough of this. Please. Just wake up.” Eddie grumbled, “Christopher asked me when you will be by again for our movie night. I-I didn’t know what to tell him. Y-you have been such an important part of our lives for a while now.”

Eddie sighed and laid his head down on Buck’s arm. He was trying to keep it together, but it was becoming harder with each passing day. Maddie came into the room and cleared her throat. She smiled at him sadly as he left to go grab Chris from abuela’s house.

\--

“Dad?”

“Yeah buddy?”

“Is Buck going to get better?” Chris asked.

“He will buddy. We just have to wait. Sometimes things happen and it takes our bodies a little longer to heal.” Eddie stated, “Don’t worry, Buck will be better before you know it.

\--

A few weeks later Buck woke up confused and alone. The doctors and nurses rushed in to see him. They called Maddie first and she informed the 118. Unfortunately, they were in the middle of a call, so as much as Eddie wanted to be by Buck’s side he couldn’t leave. Once the day was over, they rushed to the hospital to see Buck. Eddie called Isabel to explain and she informed him that she would keep Chris a little longer.

The team filed into the room and Buck smiled at Bobby.

“Hey Cap!” Buck laughed.

“You scared us Buckaroo.” Hen sighed.

Once everyone was in the room Buck looked at everyone until his eyes focused on Eddie. He turned his head to the side.

“Who’s this? Did you guys replace me already?” Buck said.

“W-What?” Eddie stated, “Y-You don’t remember me?”

“Should I?” Buck asked curiously.

\--

They were all shocked. How could Buck not remember Eddie? Eddie had left the room a short while later – too shocked to even attempt to explain who he was. He sat in silence in the waiting room until Maddie sat down next to him and put a hand on his knee.

“I’m sorry, Eddie.”

“I gotta go.” Eddie sighed, “Will you let me know what happens with him?”

“Of course.” she smiled sadly.

After more discussion they had come to realize that Buck had amnesia. He remembered everyone except Eddie. Buck didn’t remember half of the emergencies that they had been on either. It seemed that he never remembered Maddie coming back either. He thought she was just visiting. It was obvious to the team that Buck only remembered things from his Buck 1.0 days, but he seemed like his old self. Hen and Chim were watching him closely one evening when Buck had enough.

“Okay, what is it?” he groaned, “You two are driving me nuts.”

“How can you not remember the last two years?” Chim sighed, “You forgot Eddie? You two are closer than any of us.”

Buck just shrugged, “I dunno. I don’t even know the guy. Or – well I can’t remember him.”

“Okay you don’t remember Eddie…but you couldn’t have forgotten Chris!” Hen sighed.

“Who’s Chris?”

“Eddie’s son.” Chimney stated flatly.

“Nope don’t remember him either.”

Hen groaned from across the room.

\--

It had been a few weeks since Eddie had been by to see Buck. He wasn’t sure if he should even go or if his presence would make things worse. Bobby had a talk with him and told Eddie that he was being ridiculous, but a part of Eddie blamed himself for what happened to Buck. He knew logically that it wasn’t his fault, but he couldn’t stop himself.

Buck had gone home the week prior after the doctor took tests. He had advised everyone that it would be better for him to go home and get familiar with his apartment as well as his friends. Dr. Johnson also advised them that he could not go back to work for a few more weeks.

Eddie stopped before knocking on the door. He sighed to himself and shook his head. After a few moments he rose his hand and knocked – waiting for Buck to answer. When he got to the door Buck was wearing gym shorts and a white t-shirt.

“Uh – Eddie, right?” Buck asked.

“U-Uh yeah.” Eddie said softly, “Just came by to see how you’re feeling.”

“Oh, come in.” Buck smiled moving to let him in, “Want a beer?”

“No, I uh can’t stay. I need to go pick up Christopher…um, my son.”

“Oh, I see. Hen mentioned you had a kid.” Buck smiled.

Eddie pulled out his phone and showed him – thinking that he would remember Christopher the minute he saw him.

“Aw, he’s super adorable.” Buck grinned broadly.

“Yeah. I-I love this kid.”

“Um – Hen mentioned that we were best friends. I-I don’t remember. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine Buck. Just take your time. It will come back.” Eddie stated thoughtfully.

“I hope so.” Buck said walking towards the sink.

He leaned against it and suddenly Eddie was transported back to the night he and Buck had their serious discussion after the lawsuit. Buck was so sincere when he told him that he was sorry. Suddenly Eddie wished that he could go back to that night. He wished he could say everything that was on his mind now. He wanted to tell Buck how much he loved him, but he couldn’t. This Buck was not the same Buck from that night. He might never be.

Buck sighed bringing Eddie back to the present. He watched Buck carefully.

“Have I spent time with Chris?”

“Yeah. A lot of time actually.” Eddie smiled.

“Do-uh do you have any pictures of us together?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

Eddie took his phone out and brought up the picture from the day of the tsunami. He held it towards him.

“That was the day –“ Eddie started.

“Of the tsunami…” Buck finished.

Eddie rose and eyebrow, “You remember that?”

“Yes…no. I dunno. Honestly I remember some of it.” Buck sighed, “I remember looking for something or someone.”

“I-It was Christopher. You and him were on the pier.” Eddie stated, “You blamed yourself, but you protected him.”

“Oh. I-I think I’d like to meet him if that’s okay.” Buck laughed, “I mean I know I met him before, but again I mean. If you don’t mind.”

“Uh…I’ll ask him. I know he misses you, but between us he is probably gonna expect you to be the same old Buck.”

“I’m not the same old Buck?”

Eddie sighed, “You know what I mean.”

“Eddie, things will be fine.” Buck said reassuringly.

Eddie laughed to himself. For a second he thought Buck was himself again. He wasn’t sure if him meeting Christopher was wise, but his son missed Buck fiercely and he couldn’t bring himself to deny Chris.

\--

A few days later Buck showed up at Eddie’s place and Christopher was waiting in his room.

“Hey Buck.”

Buck paused before saying, “Hey buddy.”

“Dad says you’re still hurt and you may not remember everything we’ve done together.” Chris stated.

“Yeah…I’m sorry bud.” Buck frowned, feeling like he let Chris down.

“It’s okay. I missed you.” Chris sniffled.

Buck didn’t want him to cry so he sat down next to him and gathered him into his arms.

“I know buddy. I missed you too.” Buck said, “But hey, listen we can make more memories until I get my old ones back. How does that sound?”

“Great. Buck…”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.” Chris grinned.

“I-I love you too.” Buck said kissing his forehead looking towards Eddie.

\--

Buck spent the day with Chris and then he went home. It killed Buck that he didn’t remember him, but it broke his heart when Chris told him that he loved him. When he looked at Eddie it seemed that he was taking this hard as well. Buck wasn’t sure how much he hung out with them, but it seemed to be a lot. Eddie had a key to his place and vice versa. He found that out because Eddie returned his the day he came by. He said it was only right because Buck didn’t know him anymore. It broke his heart when those words came out of Eddie’s mouth, but he understood. After all he didn’t know Eddie right now, but he hoped he would in the future.

That day Buck sent Eddie a text – _I hope you didn’t mind that I told Chris I loved him. I just didn’t want him to think that old Buck didn’t love him._

Eddie: _Don’t worry about it. I get it. Get some rest._

Buck sighed and laid in bed staring at the ceiling. He hoped he could rest, but the nightmares were too much for him. A short while after he fell asleep, he felt like he couldn’t breathe. Water surrounded him. His throat was sore.

“Christopherrrrrr!” Buck yelled.

Buck jumped up immediately, heaving. He was trying to catch his breath while scrambling for his phone. He gripped his phone tightly calling Eddie.

“H-Hello…” Eddie mumbled.

“Christopher…”

“Buck? Is everything alright?” Eddie asked.

“Is Chris okay?”

“Yeah, he’s in bed. Are you okay?”

“Uh-I think so. I just had a nightmare.”

Eddie sighed, “Do you need anything?”

“No – I’m sorry for calling.”

“It’s fine Buck.”

“Goodnight Eddie.” Buck groaned after hanging up.

\--

Eddie sighed and placed his phone back down. He shook his head and made up his mind. He went to Chris’ room and started packing a bag.

\--

Buck was still staring at the ceiling when there was a knock at his door. He had no clue who it could be, but he was surprised to see Eddie with Christopher in his arms.

“What are you doing here?” he whispered.

“Come on.” Eddie sighed descending the stairs.

Buck followed curiously. He watched as Eddie placed Chris down into the bed.

“Go on.” Eddie stated, “Get in.”

Buck rose an eyebrow, but then cuddled up to Christopher. He held him close and began falling back to sleep. He heard Eddie going down the stairs and before he could think twice he told Eddie to stay.

“What?” Eddie questioned.

“Stay. Please.” Buck sighed.

“Okay…”

Eddie climbed into the bed on the other side of Chris. He adjusted the covers and before he drifted off to sleep, he felt Buck’s hand rubbing his arm. It was the best sleep they all got since Buck’s accident.

\--


	3. Chapter 3

Things were awkward after that. Buck wasn’t sure how he had been comfortable enough to just sleep with Eddie and Chris in his bed, but for some reason it all just felt right. And when he woke up the next morning to Eddie making him breakfast it seemed normal, but Buck was over thinking it. Maddie could tell something was wrong. He was lost in thought and didn’t hear her when she first spoke.

“What?” Buck asked.

“What has you so wrapped up in your head?”

“I dunno. I just – how close are me and Eddie? Or well how close were we?”

“Uh…well you guys were pretty inseparable. At work Howie says you guys were attached at the hip.” Maddie smiled sadly, “You will remember.”

“I know. I just…” Buck sighed, “I feel bad. For Christopher. For Eddie.”

“I know, but Eddie understands. You have all the time in the world to remember them.”

“Yeah.” he stated, smiling sadly.

\--

Over the next few weeks Buck would get glimpses of his life. A life he didn’t really remember having. He saw flashes of his days spent with Christopher. Flashes of Carla visiting him in the hospital. Flashes of women who he barely remembered. There was just so much Buck couldn’t piece together. Eddie was trying to give him space, but Chris was begging to be with Buck and he just didn’t know what to do. Normally, Buck would have been delighted to spend time with Chris, but this Buck was – not the Buck he knew. It was new territory for the both of them, so he compromised and had abuela bring him to the firehouse to visit the team, instead of just Buck.

Chris smiled happily as he attached himself to Buck’s waist. Eddie sighed shaking his head, but Buck just snorted and ruffled Chris’ hair.

“Hey kid!”

“Hi Buck.” Chris smiled, “Are you feeling better?”

He laughed, “Yeah buddy, much better.”

“Hey buddy, why don’t we go visit Hen or Chimney.”

“Nah…” Chris stated flatly, “I wanna stay with Buck.”

Eddie sighed, while Isabel just smiled. Buck looked at him and stated that it was fine, but Eddie wasn’t so sure. He thought that Chris was crowding Buck. Eddie didn’t want him to feel obligated because the old Buck loved his son. This Buck was different. Not as close to him or his son. Not as friendly. Not as loving. Eddie frowned and went to sit with Hen leaving Chris with Buck and Isabel.

Hen knew when he sat down that there was something wrong, but she didn’t wanna ask in front of the others so she just looked over at Buck and Christopher.

“That kid loves him.”

“Fiercely.” Eddie stated.

“And you’re worried?”

“I just don’t want Chris to crowd him. He needs to remember things on his own terms.” Eddie sighed, rubbing his face.

“I’m sure he doesn’t mind.”

“It’s hard watching my best friend not be my best friend. Does that even make sense?”

Hen laughed, “I know what you mean. He is a little more distant. I think it’s because he just doesn’t know where he stands with everyone, especially you.”

“I just want Buck back. My Buck.” he stated before going back over and scooping Chris into his arms.

Before Christopher and Isabel left Buck gave him a big bear hug and promised he would be over soon. Eddie smiled at their interaction and for one brief moment he thought Buck was back to normal, but when their eyes met Eddie knew that he wasn’t the old Buck.

\--

A few days later Buck ended up at Eddie’s door.

“Hey – uh you wanna come in?” Eddie asked.

“Y-Yeah…” Buck said before following him inside.

“Chris isn’t here. You want a beer?” Eddie asked, turning towards him.

Before he could move away Buck launched himself forward and attached himself to Eddie’s lips. Buck then placed his hands on both sides of Eddie’s face pulling him in just a little. Eddie moaned into his mouth, but it took a few moments for his brain to realize what was happening before Buck was pulling away.

Buck looked at him breathlessly with wide eyes, like a deer in headlights. Eddie cleared his throat and just raised a brow.

“Sorry – I should go.” Buck frowned, rushing towards the door.

Eddie stayed put wondering what exactly happened. He didn’t know why Buck had been there or why he kissed him. He just chuckled and shook his head, deciding to give Buck time.

\--

The situation between them seemed to get worse after that though. Eddie leaving Buck floundering for a reply any time he said hi. Or having Buck blush any time Eddie smiled his way. Hen seemed to notice, but she just left things alone.

Eddie cornered Buck in the locker room later that day.

“You wanna tell me what’s going on?”

“I-I-uh, I dunno. I just – I thought about kissing you and I did it. And now I can’t stop thinking about kissing you, but I don’t even know why because we are best friends. We haven’t been together. Wait, have we?” Buck asked confused, because he still didn’t remember everything.

Eddie laughed, “No, we have definitely never been together.”

Buck sighed, “Sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry.” Eddie smiled, “It’s fine. It was just surprising that’s all. I didn’t mind it as much as you think.”

Eddie decided that he should be honest with Buck. He didn’t want him to think that he didn’t reciprocate his feelings, especially because Buck barely remembered anything about his life. And after everything that Buck had been through Eddie just wants him to know that he isn’t going anywhere.

Buck smiled, “You mean that?”

“Yeah…” Eddie smiled.

Buck grinned and bumped his shoulder against Eddie’s before the alarm went off.

“Guess it’s time to go.” Buck said before leaving a light kiss to the side of Eddie’s lips.

Eddie watched him go before quietly following behind. Things were changing between them and Eddie wasn’t sure how he felt. On the one hand he loved Buck and would do anything for him, but he felt strange. He felt like they shouldn’t be kissing or be together until Buck remembered their friendship. But Eddie wasn’t sure how to tell him this, but it would have to wait for another time.


End file.
